17 thoughts on “What If Tim Burton Directed Disney Movies?”
Here’s a challenge for you EatLiver users: can you turn this post into political rant?
It’s dark and gloomy because Bush and Trump destroyed the EPA?
Though the stalker behind Beauty and the Beast is more similar to Bill Clinton. And we all know that he’d do with Sleeping Beauty.
And naturally Aladdin and Jasmine would never get a Green Card.
Sanders would complain that Pinocchio was denied a living wage for the work he did at the puppet show. Warren would agree and then say that Geppetto didn’t actually make Pinocchio and that someone else made it happen. Al Sharpton would have a rally to protest the too white of a cast.
I heard the Little Mermaid was caught in a gillnet off Mar-a-Lago.
Teddy Roosevelt shot the Lion King and Dumbo on safari.
Dumbo: His first State of the State address
I admit it’s lame.
Just send Kauf Buch a message…
Would’ve gone with “The Lying King”
The inevitable hobbling of the EPA and Trump’s cronyism will certainly lead to a significant increase in environmental toxins and the destruction of off-shore reefs with the resultant decimation of the mermaid population. There is a good chance Ariel won’t survive until the next election.
I always preferred the Little Mermaid’s little sister. She’s also half girl/half cod, but the other way around…
…. is scheduled to become a reality.
All Disney classics should be updated for the post-modern progressive ideocracy!
Beauty and the Disenfranchised Trans-Species Minority
The Nightmare Before A Non-Denominational Year-End Holiday We’re Not Allowed to Name
Two Mexican Dalmatians and Ninety Nine Anchor Pups
Aladdin Does Sweden
The Differently-Abled-But-Definitely-Not-Handicapped Person of Notre Dame
Snow-White Privilege and the Seven Diversity Hires
Finding Nemo’s Gender Identity
Lady-Boy and the Food-Stamp Tramp
There’s a start for you libbers. Off to movies with you (since you don’t have jobs anyway). Go shout your hippie solidarity slogans at the big screen. “Oh no, Snow White! Don’t eat that apple! It might not be artisinally-grown non-GMO fair-trade cooperative-owned dolphin-safe organic!”
1
Dalmatians are from Croatia, you typically intellectually incurious knee-jerking right-wing troglodyte.
These Dalmatians self-identify as Mexican, you racist! Stop micro-aggressing Croatian-Mexicans!
(In any case: I’m going to build a kennel, and those hounds WILL pay for it.)
Most of them look like they just saw their parents nude for the first time…
1
None of these characters are able to live at Disney now, they are all immigrants and I doubt they came here legally. Aladdin looks like a terrorist as well, they should security check him.
1
Win. I was thinking they were kinda cute, then I read your comment. Now I can’t stop laughing!
Here’s a challenge for you EatLiver users: can you turn this post into political rant?
It’s dark and gloomy because Bush and Trump destroyed the EPA?
Though the stalker behind Beauty and the Beast is more similar to Bill Clinton. And we all know that he’d do with Sleeping Beauty.
And naturally Aladdin and Jasmine would never get a Green Card.
Sanders would complain that Pinocchio was denied a living wage for the work he did at the puppet show. Warren would agree and then say that Geppetto didn’t actually make Pinocchio and that someone else made it happen. Al Sharpton would have a rally to protest the too white of a cast.
I heard the Little Mermaid was caught in a gillnet off Mar-a-Lago.
Teddy Roosevelt shot the Lion King and Dumbo on safari.
Dumbo: His first State of the State address
I admit it’s lame.
Just send Kauf Buch a message…
Would’ve gone with “The Lying King”
The inevitable hobbling of the EPA and Trump’s cronyism will certainly lead to a significant increase in environmental toxins and the destruction of off-shore reefs with the resultant decimation of the mermaid population. There is a good chance Ariel won’t survive until the next election.
I always preferred the Little Mermaid’s little sister. She’s also half girl/half cod, but the other way around…
…. is scheduled to become a reality.
All Disney classics should be updated for the post-modern progressive ideocracy!
Beauty and the Disenfranchised Trans-Species Minority
The Nightmare Before A Non-Denominational Year-End Holiday We’re Not Allowed to Name
Two Mexican Dalmatians and Ninety Nine Anchor Pups
Aladdin Does Sweden
The Differently-Abled-But-Definitely-Not-Handicapped Person of Notre Dame
Snow-White Privilege and the Seven Diversity Hires
Finding Nemo’s Gender Identity
Lady-Boy and the Food-Stamp Tramp
There’s a start for you libbers. Off to movies with you (since you don’t have jobs anyway). Go shout your hippie solidarity slogans at the big screen. “Oh no, Snow White! Don’t eat that apple! It might not be artisinally-grown non-GMO fair-trade cooperative-owned dolphin-safe organic!”
Dalmatians are from Croatia, you typically intellectually incurious knee-jerking right-wing troglodyte.
These Dalmatians self-identify as Mexican, you racist! Stop micro-aggressing Croatian-Mexicans!
(In any case: I’m going to build a kennel, and those hounds WILL pay for it.)
Most of them look like they just saw their parents nude for the first time…
None of these characters are able to live at Disney now, they are all immigrants and I doubt they came here legally. Aladdin looks like a terrorist as well, they should security check him.
Win. I was thinking they were kinda cute, then I read your comment. Now I can’t stop laughing!
Ban the EPA